Third Step...I Think?

Hi,

So recently,

My car's window got smashed while I was inside the car.

The story goes like this;

My car's passenger seat window got smashed on 21st January at the cross traffic light at Desa Jaya's Chapel of Christ the Light (from LDP heading to Tmn Daya).

Before assuming anything, I have always put my handbag in the middle of seats (gearbox hand dash-box there) since I started driving.

I was day dreaming and radio was on. 

Didn't notice a bike next to me.

It was a busy Thursday night at 9pm with a lot of people coming back from work. 

Couldn't react as fast as I could. 

Everything happened in 5-10secs. 

02 Malays on an unknown bike. (16 or 17 yrs old from their body shape)

Weapon was some long and sharp metal pole/stick. (don't know how u call it)

Too dark, too fast, couldn't see the bike plat number and they wore helmets. (I have shortsightedness too, couldn't see far ahead...)

They turned back to me twice and mocked me.

I wished I could've done something to kick or whack them but I couldn't because my life could be the one in danger, not theirs. 

If I whack them, they fell, car comes and they die of getting run over, I will have to go to jail for the attempt of murder / illegally self-defense shit.

I am physically unharmed but emotionally damaged lol.

I won't say be careful because once they set their eyes on you, it's already too late unless you are lucky enough.

Everyone told me that it's bad luck and be careful next time.

It kind of bummed me with that 'be careful' advise.

You can't.

You really couldn't, unless miracle or lady luck appears...

(Car got smashed by 02 Malay robbers, hit, rob & run)

All the while, I never thought it would happen to me.

But it did.

So when it happened just right in front of me...

I was the victim...

I was really scared and panicked.

Still traumatized and afraid because everything was in my bag.

Office keys, wallet, credit / debit cards, ID, driving license and other properties that I don't remember of.

I only needed to call my sister, my boss and drive to the nearest police station.

Everything has been settled and I talked to the 02 guys I am seeing.

That was the unnecessary Third Step that I took again.

I initiated again.

I went out with them again and yes,

I will just see how this goes.

And no,

I am not playing any games or taking it too seriously.

I still want to know them better.

I do enjoy their companies and gentleness.

Albeit funny and lame sometimes.

But yes,

I do get impatient and frustrated.

As I feel...it is one-sided with one of the men.

My heart literally fluttered when I think so.

It shakes me and affects how I behave,

I just wish I am not being too unreasonable and greedy.

Or too persuasive.

Or too desperate.

Or care too much on how people think / look at me.

Breathing is never this hard.